As you carry out your business, your smooth cheeks send a message to the world that you are in control. It’s you who wealds the razor of authority and it’s you who makes the decisions. You chin smugly lets passers by know that it could grow the mother of all beards if it wanted to, but instead you’ve chosen to display all it’s silky smooth glory. Your hairless complexion sends a strong message: you are the boss.
Favoured by intellectuals, a goatee tells the world you know loads of stuff. If people have a question, you can most probably answer it. Need a tricky algebraic equation solving? Your goatee says you’re the man who can do it. It tells us that you are sophisticated soul who appreciates the finer things in life. You may or may not like poetry (a goatee doesn’t give everything away).
SHORT AND NEATLY GROOMED.
Your neat beard smells of spring time meadows and glistens like moonlight on a lake, thanks to your beard oil. It says you are a tidy and reliable chap who enjoys deep, philosophical talks and long walks. It tells the world you are a man with a vision. You set yourself goals and you achieve them. You appreciate the wonder of the universe and so does your beard.
BIG AND BUSHY.
Your beard doesn’t say much. It makes a lot of manly grunts which imply you are too busy doing manly things to have time for things like grooming. It occasionally tells people over a pint that you are building a Viking ship in your garden with your bare hands, but that’s because it’s prone to exaggerating things. Your beard gives you Samson-like strength so it also acts as a visual warning to potential foe not to mess with you.
Your mutton chops exude friendliness and let everyone know you are an are approachable dude with a fun lovin’ streak. You are creative and your whiskers say you have even written a fair few songs which are pretty good. You probably have a raucous laugh, skinny jeans and at least two pairs of winkle pickers.
There you have it. Be safe in the knowledge that whatever your facial hair of choice, at Neocape we appreciate each and every whisker no matter how big or small.